Forgiveness

The Expression of Love By the Servant Believer

By Michael K. Farrar, O.D.

© God’s Breath Publications

 

Luke 23:33-34

“Jesus said, ‘Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.’”

 

“We are most like beasts when we kill each other, we are most like men when we judge each other, and we are most like God when we forgive each other.”

Author Unknown

 

Colossians 2:13-15

“When you were dead in your sins and in the uncircumcision of your sinful nature, God made you alive with Christ. He forgave us all our sins, having canceled the written code, with its regulations, that was against us and that stood opposed to us; he took it away, nailing it to the cross. And having disarmed the powers and authorities, he made a public spectacle of them, triumphing over them by the cross.”

 

“God forgives only the penitent, and one of the chief evidences of true penitence is a forgiving spirit.”

John Stott

 

Matthew 18:21-22

“Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, ‘Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?’ Jesus answered, ‘I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.’”

 

Contrasting Revenge and Forgiveness

 

Revenge

 

From an article in a New York newspaper.

“Sweet, blissful, deeply satisfying revenge. Of all the devices of spiteful human behavior it must quite the most fulfilling. To forgive, forget and turn the other cheek may be very noble, but not half as rewarding. Now the art of precision retaliation has reached new heights with one man’s crusade against simple forgiveness being translated into master class form. Ever since mild-mannered New Yorker Philip Seldon suffered at the hands of bullying classmates he has learned to exorcize his rage with a staggering array of retribution. Now he is running classes that offer innumerable tactics to exact revenge. He even offers a one-on-one $75 service for individual advice. Seldon wants the world to know why revenge is healthy and how you too can be cruelly vindictive.”

 

Forgiveness

 

On July 25th, 1993 at the congregation of St. James’ Church in Capetown a hooded gunman broke in and fired indiscriminately at the congregation killing 11 individuals and seriously injuring others. One of the church leaders emerged from this horrific event to make a statement so it could be carried on the national news. “While as Christians we must live in this fallen world, we do so knowing that at the end there is a new world coming, when Jesus will be acknowledged to be King. The members of St. James’ seek no revenge and harbor no bitterness. We are content to leave justice in the hands of the Almighty where is appointed a day of judgment when all will have to give an account of their actions.”

 

The Westminster Shorter Catechism states that the chief end of man is to glorify God and to enjoy Him forever. This life of freedom and servanthood is made possible when we accept God’s Son as Lord and Savior. This gift of grace was provided when Jesus gave up His life on the cross for all of mankind. His victory over death and the grave verifies the truth that God is willing to forgive anyone of their sins. God’s forgiveness bridges the gap of sin that separates us from a relationship with Him.

 

We often find it difficult to accept forgiveness from God, others, and ourselves. Very likely the reason is that God seems distant, other people seem insincere and we feel unworthy. Forgiveness is often as hard to receive, as it is to give. Hopefully after this class we will understand the importance of accepting God’s forgiveness and forgiving those who sin against us.

 

When we understand that God is honest and complete in His forgiveness and that He expects and commands us to forgive, we will begin to grasp the importance of living under His loving grace. Grace received completely, fosters an attitude and mindset of forgiveness towards others as well as ourselves. May we all come to a full knowledge of how much we have been forgiven so we may forgive those who wound and hurt us.

 

Forgiveness is always a relational activity. It requires a forgiver and the forgiven, as well as the creator who works in the lives of both. Forgiveness is an even more critical issue when the Holy Spirit resides within those involved in a relationship. God desires that His children love one another. The world will know of God’s love as we demonstrate that love towards one another in our actions of forgiveness. (John 13:35)

 

Forgiveness Freely Available

 

Forgiveness always costs something and Divine forgiveness from God is the most costly of endeavors. It demands absolutely complete payment for the sins of all individuals desiring to obtain a relationship with God and eternal life. No partial payment or negotiation is allowed. These high standards are in many ways beyond our meager human understanding. The holiness of God that demands such strict requirements is purity in perfection.

 

In the Old Testament atonement for sins was made through the priests and sacrificial offerings of unblemished animals. This atonement though was partial and could be described more as a covering rather than a complete forgiveness. Until Christ came no animal sacrifice was adequate to fully wipe out the penalties for sins.

 

Hebrews 9:22

“In fact, the law requires that nearly everything be cleansed with blood, and without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.”

 

Hebrews 10:11

“Day after day every priest stands and performs his religious duties; again and again he offers the same sacrifices, which can never take away sins.”

 

There is no better forgiver than God. The forgiveness that Christ offers is complete since He is the perfect sacrifice for all sins of all mankind. No religion except Christianity teaches that God completely forgives sin. It is hard to comprehend why a holy and perfect God would reach out to creatures such as us. God desired to show His goodness and love by giving us the opportunity to obtain forgiveness for our sins, the gift of the Holy Spirit and eternal life.

 

Romans 5:8

“But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”

 

John 3:16-17

“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”

 

John 2:1-2

“He is the atoning sacrifice for our sins, and not only for ours but also for the sins of the whole world.”

 

Colossians 1:12-14

“For he has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.”

 

Isaiah 43:25

“I, even I, am he who blots out your transgressions, for my own sake, and remembers your sins no more.”

 

Hebrews 10:12-18

“But when this priest had offered for all time one sacrifice for sins, he sat down at the right hand of God. Since that time he waits for his enemies to be made his footstool, because by one sacrifice he has made perfect forever those who are being made holy. The Holy Spirit also testifies to us about this. First he says: ‘This is the covenant I will make with them after that time, says the Lord. I will put my laws in their hearts, and I will write them on their minds.’ Then he adds: “Their sins and lawless acts I will remember no more. And where these have been forgiven, there is no longer any sacrifice for sin.’”

 

The only requirement of us is to repent of our sins and accept the sacrifice that Jesus gave on the cross. This enables us to receive the forgiveness that God in His love is willing to offer.

 

Romans 10:10

“For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved.”

 

Acts 2:38

“Peter replied, “Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit.”

 

Acts 10:43

“All the prophets testify about him that everyone who believes in him receives forgiveness of sins through his name.”

 

Ephesians 1:7-10

“In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace that he lavished on us with all wisdom and understanding. And he made known to us the mystery of his will according to his good pleasure, which he purposed in Christ, to be put into effect when the times will have reached their fulfillment-to bring all things in heaven and on earth together under one head, even Christ.’”

 

Ephesians 2:8-9

“For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith, and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God not by works, so that no one can boast.”

Having repented and accepted Christ as our Savior, we then accept His forgiveness of our sins, past, present and future. This begins our new life in Christ and we may no longer fear any judgment or penalty for our sins.

 

Hebrews 10:19-24

“Therefore, brothers, since we have confidence to enter the Most Holy Place by the blood of Jesus, by a new and living way opened for us through the curtain, that is, his body, and since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water. Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful.”

 

Sometimes we have difficulty feeling we are forgiven or living in the hope that God has truly forgiven us. In such situations building a relationship with our Lord will encourage faith and trust in Him. Trusting God is necessary in order for us to experience the forgiveness that we have truly received. We often need to grow spiritually in order to fully understand the promises of God and comprehend how He is able to forgive us and forget our sins completely.

 

Psalms 103:12

“As far as the east is from the west, so far hath he removed our transgressions from us.” 

 

Sometimes we take lightly the forgiveness we have received. Spiritual maturity is needed to continually appreciate the sacrifice that God made to enable us to have salvation. Once we become a child of God, He will work in our lives through His word, His Spirit and other believers to bring us to a full understanding and appreciation for the forgiveness that we have received.

 

Philippians 1:5-6

“Being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”

Christ’s sacrifice on the cross was sufficient to save us from all our sins, and He speaks in our defense if we sin after we accept Him as our Savior.

 

1 John 2:1

“My dear children, I write this to you so that you will not sin. But if anybody does sin, we have one who speaks to the Father in our defense-Jesus Christ, the Righteous One.’”

 

Forgiveness Continually Granted

 

Even though we are Christians and have been forgiven of the penalties of sins we do continue to sin. Sin in our lives will hinder our relationship with our Heavenly Father. When we are out of fellowship with our Lord, it will affect all aspects of our lives as well as relationships with others. We must keep a short account with God by confessing sins that we commit. This restores our relationship with God and sets us back on track in the path of holiness.

 

1 John 1:8-10

“If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. If we claim we have not sinned, we make him out to be a liar and his word has no place in our lives.”

 

“Forgiveness as we live our Christian lives is not ours until we seek it with repentance….When you turned from your sin your repentance was clear and it was deliberate. If then our Christian lives are to be a journey of continual repentance then our repentance needs to be equally clear and equally deliberate….Our sins after we are converted are not forgiven until we repent of them. God has not provided for us some great slush fund as it were that we’re able to just slosh between a debit and a credit side in the ledger. He has made for us once and for all an atoning sacrifice for sin in Jesus. He has declared that the penalty is no longer held against us but as we walk through the journey of our days and as the clouds of disintegrated fellowship descend upon us He awaits, AFather forgive me. Father I’m sorry. Father I shouldn’t have said that.”

Alistair Begg

 

Psalms 32:1-5

“Blessed is he whose transgressions are forgiven, whose sins are covered. Blessed is the man whose sin the LORD does not count against him and in whose spirit is no deceit. When I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long. For day and night your hand was heavy upon me; my strength was sapped as in the heat of summer. Then I acknowledged my sin to you and did not cover up my iniquity. I said, ‘I will confess my transgressions to the LORD’– and you forgave the guilt of my sin.”

 

Asking for forgiveness is a continual need in the life of a Christian. This verse in Psalms 32 illustrates what we already know to be true. When we fail to confess our sins to our Lord it poisons our relationship with Him. We have quenched God’s Spirit within us and we reap the harvest of unconfessed sin we have planted.

 

In the 17th century a group of Christians listed things that they felt they needed to ask forgiveness for to acknowledge their ongoing repentance.

 

1. An ignorance of God and a lack of nearness to Him.

 

2. Exceeding great selfishness in all that we do.

 

3. The fact that we are glad to find excuses for the neglect of our duties.

 

4. The fact that we neglect the reading of scripture in the secret place.

 

5. The fact of our refined hypocrisy whereby we desire to appear what indeed we are not.

 

6. The fact that we are more ready to search out and censure faults in others than to see or deal with the faults in ourselves.

 

7. A foolish wasting away of time with useless conversation.

 

8. The existence of bitterness rather than zeal.

 

9. Too much eyeing of our own credit and applause, being pleased with it when we get it and unsatisfied when we don’t.

 

Even though God forgives us for our transgressions we will often have to face the consequences for our actions. Sometimes God will spare us through mercy and at other times He will permit us to experience the results of our disobedient acts.

 

“There are consequences for our actions. The fact of forgiveness does not mitigate consequence, nor does the existence of consequence eradicate the reality of forgiveness.”

Alistair Begg

 

Often the Lord will discipline us when we have sinned or fallen away. This does not mean were not forgiven when we first accepted Him or that He is unwilling to forgive us. His intention is to bring us back into fellowship with Him and to perfect our faith in Him.

 

Hebrews 12:5-6

“My son, do not make light of the Lord’s discipline, and do not lose heart when he rebukes you, because the Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punishes everyone he accepts as a son.”

 

There is a good reason we are to look on God as our Heavenly Father. Just as a parent will love, cherish, protect, and discipline their child, God will act similarly towards us. When we sin we may grieve the Spirit of God but we do not drive Him from our lives. God promised to always be with us. When we accept Christ as our Savior we can know that this relationship is eternal.

 

“The Spirit of God never abandons the child of God.”

Alistair Begg

 

 

Hindrances to Forgiveness

 

What things keep us from forgiving others?

 

Emotional Reasons

 

The hurt is too deep.

 

The hurt is too personal.

 

The anger towards the person is too great.

 

The fear of the person is too overwhelming.

 

The hurt has been too frequently inflicted.

 

There are numerous emotional reasons we have difficulty forgiving those who sin against us. Damaged emotions and hurt can build up huge thick walls that will hinder our willingness to seek to forgive. Sometimes we tend to isolate ourselves when we are hurt and the last thing we seek is to forgive the person who hurt us. Our strength in such times will come from God’s Spirit who lives within us. Only with God’s help can deep hurt be overcome to allow the words of forgiveness to be said.

 

Other times we will strike out in anger at those we should forgive. Again, God’s Spirit can temper our emotions and show us how best to respond to those who have caused us pain. It is critical at such times when anger is boiling to strive to listen to the prompting of the Holy Spirit and let Him minister to us.

 

Ephesians 4:26

“‘In your anger do not sin.’ Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.”

 

Rational Reasons We Use Not To Forgive

 

It wouldn’t be fair to forgive because it wouldn’t equal the hurt that was done.

 

It probably won’t change the other person.

 

Why shouldn’t revenge be an option?

 

Sometimes we don’t forgive because we want to be the JUDGE and make sure justice is done. We look upon ourselves as the person who should determine that the sin that has been committed is paid for properly. We put ourselves in the position as the evaluator of adequate repentance before forgiveness is granted. We need to remember that forgiving is something we need to do regardless of the response of the other person. We are called to forgive all who transgress against us. God is our model for forgiveness. His love manifested in our lives will give us the conviction and ability to forgive even those who seek to do us harm.

 

People We Have Difficulty Forgiving.

 

Jerks

 

Cruel People

 

Family members

 

Liars

 

People who aren’t as good as me.

 

People who keep hurting me.

 

People who aren’t sorry.

 

It’s easy to forgive those who are sorry, those who feel bad about what they have done or those who desire forgiveness. God calls us to forgive everyone. We are commanded to forgive, so we may minister to others, to prevent bitterness and anger from eroding our lives and to sustain our relationship with God. Unless we seek to forgive others, our hearts will never heal, our minds will never be transformed and our wounds will never mend. These traumas of the soul will turn into a spiritual cancer that will gnaw away at our relationship with the Lord.

 

Sometimes we don’t forgive because if we do we will lose a relationship. In these cases the only thing enabling the dysfunctional relationship to exist is unforgiveness. Forgiveness in these situations will break the negative bond that is allowing the relationship to remain. Such relationships need to be allowed to die if the only thing allowing them to exist is unforgiveness.

 

Sometimes we don’t forgive because the past we need to forgive is still in the present. The person is still doing to us, what we are contemplating forgiving them for in the past. Forgiveness does not mean we do not confront or hold someone accountable for continual mistreatment. Spiritual maturity in our lives will be marked by forgiveness for sins against us but also the speaking of truth in love so that relationships can flourish. While Christ instructs us to turn the other cheek when wronged (Matthew 5:38,39) there are times when we need to stand up for our rights. When Christ was struck in John 18:22,23 by an officer He did not turn the other cheek but confronted the man. God does not call us to be doormats.

 

Forgiveness Commanded To Be Given

 

An old poem on Forgiveness

 

Forgive our sins as we forgive, You taught us Lord to pray.

But you alone can grant us grace, to live the words we say.

How can Your pardon reach and bless, the unforgiving heart.

That broods on wrong, and will not let, old bitterness depart.

In blazing light your cross reveals, the truth we dimly knew.

Oh small the debt men owe to us, how great our debt to You.

Oh cleanse the debts within our souls, and bid resentment cease.

Then reconciled to God and man, our lives will spread your peace.

 

There is a story that when Leonardo DaVinci was painting his painting of the Last Supper he had difficulty painting the face of Judas. He struggled with painting Judas’ face as a friendly face, a companion of Jesus. He couldn’t necessarily portray Judas as evil either. In order to finish the painting he had to paint his own face to represent Judas. If we put ourselves in the place of the person who has sinned against us we can go a long way in being able to forgive them.

 

Forgiveness is a tender characteristic of our Heavenly Father and it should be an attribute we possess as we allow the Holy Spirit to manifest the gifts of God within our lives. Knowing how much we have been forgiven, we should seek to forgive others who sin against us.

 

In the portion of the Lord’s Prayer which petitions for food and forgiveness we see that Jesus instructs us to move from food that is our basic physical need to forgiveness, which is our basic spiritual, need. Even if we have been saved we still need to ask for forgiveness for sins we continue to commit. While we have been saved from the penalty of sin, we have not yet been saved from the presence of sin. We will fail at times in our Christian lives and find it necessary to keep a short account with God by praying for forgiveness for our shortcomings.

 

God knows that forgiving us is necessary in order for Him to fellowship with us. He also is well aware that we need to forgive others if we desire to serve Him, honor Him and continue on the path of Holiness He calls us to.

 

We need to follow God’s example and forgive the sins of others. This process of forgiveness can eventually lead to the forgetting of the sins against us. God forgets immediately when we ask for forgiveness. We are capable of this as well if we truly forgive and allow the Holy Spirit to reign in our lives. God can work miracles with our emotions, our memories and our lives if we give forgiveness a chance. God commands us to forgive and enables the Holy Spirit to give us the power to accomplish this daunting task.

 

“The unforgiving spirit is the number one killer of spiritual life….Do you want to be spiritually useless? I’ll tell you what to do. Refuse to forgive others and you will be as spiritually ineffective so fast It’ll make your head spin.”

Alistair Begg

 

Matthew 6:12-15

“Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one. For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”

 

Matthew 18:21-22

“Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, ‘Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?’ Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.”

 

Here we find Peter coming to Jesus with a question of how many times to forgive an offender. Peter probably thinks he is portraying himself as rather holy. The Rabbinic teaching of the day said that a man must forgive his brother, but not more than three times. The Biblical support for this comes from the book of Amos (Amos 1:3, 6, 9, 2:1, 4, 6, 13). The Jewish teaching was that as meager humans we could not match or beat God so while in these verses God forgives up to four times man should only be able to forgive three times. Here Peter answers his own question with what he feels is an appropriate answer. He doubles the normally accepted figure of three and adds one for good measure. Unfortunately Jesus has a different standard and gives an answer that indicates an infinite number of seventy times seven.

 

Matthew 18:23-35

“Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. As he began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand talents was brought to him. Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt. “The servant fell on his knees before him. ‘Be patient with me,’ he begged, ‘and I will pay back everything.’ The servant’s master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go. “But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii. He grabbed him and began to choke him. ‘Pay back what you owe me!’ he demanded. “His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay you back.’ “But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt. When the other servants saw what had happened, they were greatly distressed and went and told their master everything that had happened. “Then the master called the servant in. ‘You wicked servant,’ he said, ‘I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?’ In anger his master turned him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed. “This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart.”

 

Ten thousand talents in Jesus’ day are equivalent to $10,000,000 today. One hundred denarii are equivalent to $18 today. The debt of the second servant could be carried in a pocket while the debt of the first servant would have to be carried by 8,600 carriers bearing sacks weighing 60 pounds each. The truth here is the same that is found in the Lord’s Prayer. God forgave our huge debt of sin; the least we can do is forgive the tiny debts of transgressions against us.

 

Mark 11:24-25

“And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.”

 

Luke 6:37

“Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.”

 

Luke 17:3-4

“If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him. If he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times comes back to you and says, ‘I repent,’ forgive him.”

 

Jesus’ point here is not that we only forgive seven times, nor that we only forgive if someone is sorry or repents. Jesus is trying to emphasize that continual forgiveness is necessary to live a holy life.

 

Matthew 5:43-48

“You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your brothers, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.”

 

The Pharisees and religious leaders of Jesus’ day had a way of redefining who one’s neighbor was. It began with limiting it to those of Jewish descent. One’s neighbor then was further limited to those who were of the immediate family. Eventually neighbor was defined as only those who you liked. Is it any wonder that Jesus condemned the religious leaders of the day for their cold stony hearts?

 

Our unwillingness to forgive others will hinder our relationship with God and others. It is unhealthy and grieves the Spirit of God.

 

Matthew 5:23,24

“Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift.”

 

Ephesians 4:29-32

“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”

 

We are called to be Christ-like in our actions and behavior but also in our inward thoughts and emotions. We need to let forgiveness not only be in our words, but also in our actions and our innermost heart.

 

Colossians 3:12-14

“Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.”

 

Ephesians 4:31-32

“Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”

 

Sometimes the reason we avoid forgiving others is that our own sins can be seen in others. We seek to hold others accountable for their sins when the same sins interweave within our own lives. In some twisted way we think that by condemning others and refusing to forgive them we can justify our own failures in holiness.

 

“I see my own sins best in other people.”

Alistair Begg

 

Selfishness runs deep within our soul. It is one of the main reasons we are reluctant to forgive others. Even if we do forgive, we are only too ready to run back into the past and dig up old supposedly forgiven offenses and hold them against those who have hurt us in the past.

 

“We say we bury the hatchet but we leave the handle sticking up for immediate use.”

Dwight L. Moody

 

“Forgetting is the result of complete forgiveness; it is never the means. It is the final step, not the first…. forgetful forgiveness is not a case of holy amnesia that erases the past. Instead, it is the experience of healing that draws the poison from the wound…. True, the hornet of memory may fly again, but forgiveness has drawn its sting.”

David Augsbuger

 

“You reach into the unchangeable past and cut away the wrong from the person who wronged you, you erase the one thing, the only thing, that can remedy the inevitability of painful history. The grace to do it is from God. The decision to do it is our own.”

Lewis B. Smedes

 

The Promise Involved in Forgiveness

 

“Forgiveness is ultimately not a feeling, but a promise…. Our experience of the forgiveness of God is based upon our willingness to take Him at His word.”

Alistair Begg

 

Forgiveness is a commitment of the will. It is a promise to acquit the person who has hurt us of any judgment that we might inflict on them for their injury against us.

 

This is a three-fold promise

 

1. I forgive you and therefore will not bring the matter up to you again.

 

2. I will not bring the matter up to someone else.

 

3. I will not bring the matter up to myself.

 

This does not mean that forgiveness is something that only engages our minds.

 

Matthew 18:35

“This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart.”

 

If we make the promise to forgive often the feelings will follow as the Spirit comforts us and works His healing. The act of forgiveness allows us to move on in life and continue to live holy and blameless in God’s eyes. We must remember that the benefits of forgiveness do not work like a light switch. When we forgive others it may take a long time for the actual hurt to subside. The ministry of the Holy Spirit is consistent and persistent but not always instantaneous.

 

Forgiveness is a costly thing. It can take everything in our humanity to say, “Please forgive me.” And it is just as demanding to utter the phrase, “I forgive you.” We can experience grief when we forgive someone and they don’t appear to appreciate it or change their behavior. We must remember that our offering forgiveness does not depend on the response of the other person. It always helps when repentance is evident and an apology is offered but often we will be called upon to forgive even when these responses are absent.

 

2 Corinthians 2:10-11

“If you forgive anyone, I also forgive him. And what I have forgiven-if there was anything to forgive-I have forgiven in the sight of Christ for your sake, in order that Satan might not outwit us. For we are not unaware of his schemes.”

 

Here in 2 Corinthians we are given an example where Christians are instructed by Paul to forgive a person who has committed a sin (1 Corinthians 5:1-5). He implies that unless this is done Satan may take advantage of the situation either in their lives or the one that needs to be forgiven. This tells us that another reason to forgive is so that we can prevent further trauma to others and ourselves from Satan and his demons.

 

Conclusion

 

Spiritual Truths to remember…

 

We are all God’s debtors on account of sin.

 

None of us is able to repay the debt.

 

The debt has been paid for all those who come to believe in Christ.

 

We in turn, must forgive those who are indebted to us in order that we might experience the assurance of forgiveness.

 

It really should not be too difficult for those who have been forgiven so much to forgive the trivial offenses against them.

 

The unforgiving person is destined for a life of eternal torment.

 

The offended and the offender should take steps towards reconciliation.

 

Forgiveness creates a new possibility of fairness by releasing us from the unfair past. If we do not forgive, our only recourse is revenge. But revenge glues us to the past and it dooms us to repeat it. Forgiveness brings fairness to the forgiver. Forgiveness turns off the videotape of pained memory.

 

Forgiveness sets you free.

 

Forgiving is not excusing. We excuse people when we understand that they are not to blame for the wrong they did us. We forgive only when we blame beforehand.

 

Forgiving is not smoothing things over. Forgiving happens only when we first admit our hurt and are willing to let the ministry of forgiveness release the offender and heal our wound.

 

“How do people forgive? They forgive slowly. We should not count on power to forgive bad hurts very quickly. They forgive communally. We need to help each other to be able to forgive. We need the strength of others who have suffered as we have. We need each other’s support. They forgive as they are forgiven. When it comes down to it, anyone who forgives can hardly tell the difference between feeling forgiven and doing forgiving. We are such a mixture of sinners and sinned against, we cannot forgive people who offend us without feeling that we are being set free ourselves.”

Corrie Ten Boom

 

Forgiveness is like putting down a 50-pound pack after a long hiking.

 

Forgiveness is like falling into lush green grass after a long run.

 

“Forgiveness is not a skill that is mastered and becomes second nature. It must be faced each time injury or injustice strikes. Forgiveness is not a gift one claims, internalizes, and then possesses for life. It must be rediscovered in each situation of pain. We never grow beyond the learning stage; we never go beyond the level of student. Forgiveness is not an act – it is a process. It is not a single transaction – it is a series of steps. Forgiveness takes time.”

David Augsburger

 

Romans 12:18-19

“If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”

 

Romans 14:19-20

“Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification.”

 

Ephesians 4:2-3

“Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.”

 

Colossians 3:15-16

“Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.”

 

Luke 6:36

“Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.”

 

Three Crucial Questions We All Have to Answer

 

1. Have you accepted Christ as your Savior?

 

If not, now is a good time to ask God to forgive you of your sins and become a child of the King.

 

2. Are there sins you have failed to ask God forgiveness for?

 

If so, now is a good time to confess those to your loving Heavenly Father. He desires an intimate relationship with you and when you confess your sins you break down the wall you have erected.

 

3. Are there people who you need to forgive?

 

If so, now is a good time to forgive anyone who has hurt you in the past. Holding onto unforgiveness will breed bitterness and dramatically increase the pain. It builds a wall between you and your Lord. Why not take a moment and think of those who have done you wrong and wipe the slate clean. Give them the grace God has given you. Let the Holy Spirit give you the strength, courage and peace to forgive.