COLOSSIANS – Part Twelve

By Michael K. Farrar, O.D.

© God’s Breath Publications

www.godsbreathpublications.com

 

Colossians was written by the Apostle Paul while he was under house arrest in Rome. Epaphras, the pastor of the church in Colossae, came to Paul to share how well the Christians were growing in faith, but also to ask for help to address the issue of false teaching that was threatening the church. Paul responded by writing this letter of encouragement. In the first several chapters of this book Paul covered basic doctrine as well as the blessings and privileges that Christians have in knowing Christ as Savior. Here in this passage Paul shares practical ways to live out Christian living in the relationships found in the home as well as that of financial employment.

 

The Holy Word is extremely valuable for spiritual instruction and it is also immensely practical when it comes to the earthly roles we live out in relationships with others. Paul here addresses the relationship between a husband and wife and their children in the following verses.

 

Colossians 3:18-21

“Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them. Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord. Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.”

 

Paul begins this portion of scripture stating that wives should submit to their husbands. He substantiates this command with the fact that this is the fitting way, the obedient way that the Lord Jesus Christ would have it. In today’s society this can run across the grain of what is accepted for normal marital relations. The world tells us that this is an oppressive command because it does not understand the loving bond a Christian wife and husband have. The world tells us this is demeaning to a woman because it does not understand the submission Christ had towards His heavenly father and it cannot comprehend the humble and serving leadership to which a Christian man is called. For a Christian wife to submit to her husband does not mean she has no voice in matters of importance. It does not mean she blindly obeys all commands of her husband. Paul is laying down a godly structure for a deeply committed marriage between two mutually submissive and loving Christian partners. In Ephesians 5:21-33 Paul shares God’s instruction in a similar fashion;

 

“Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— for we are members of his body. ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.’ This is a profound mystery — but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.”

 

As you notice in Ephesians he talks about how God wants the wife and husband to submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. This is portraying a mutual love and respect for one another. The husband is the head of the household and the wife is to respect and submit to him. But the husband’s call on his life in the marriage is that he is to love his wife like Christ loved the church. What does this entail you might ask? It is a full and total sacrificial love. The husband is to honor his wife and seek to serve, protect and care for her. Husbands are not to treat their wives harshly such as being overbearing, demeaning or hurtful. When Christian wives and husbands live out their mutually submissive roles that God has laid down in scripture then the marriage is stable and honoring to each of them.

 

When Colossians talks about the wife submitting to their husband it is suggesting a godly loyalty and respect for his role as head of the home. The Greek word, “hupotasso” means to subject oneself willingly. Submission does not imply inferiority. Submission is not absolute, as in an ungodly request to do evil. The wife is not bound to be obedient or submissive in other words if the husband asks her to do something evil or sinful. The husband is also not to be oppressive and authoritarian in the way he treats his wife.

 

The love spoken of here is “agape” love, which is love without limits and not expecting anything in return. Notice that this love is to be mutual with the intent of each spouse attempting to “out love” the other in their quest and passion to please the other. This is a continuous love that weathers the storms and struggles that will normally happen as difficult life events take place and when controversial decisions must be made. This is not a surface love, but a self-sacrificial love that can stand the test of time. It is a love that is not based on transient emotions or on outward physical appearance. It is based on the spiritual connection that each share in Christ and reflects their commitment to God. A loving husband will not treat his wife with bitterness and resentment which can cause the marriage relationship to spoil. The husband pleases his wife with loving sensitive authority and the wife in return pleases her husband with loving submissive respect.

 

Paul moves next to the relationship between parents and children. Children are instructed to obey their parents which validates the commandment spoken of in Exodus 20:12 and Deuteronomy 5:16. This commandment is to show respect to parental authority as well as to lengthen the life of the children. It demonstrates that when respect of authority is given there is a reward for honoring the wisdom and experience of those who have authority over you. It is reflective of the respect we have for God as our spiritual Father who loves and cares for us. His laws, ways and instruction in His Word are meant to be for our own good and protection. When we honor our parents we are at peace with them and God. When children obey their parents they show their love for God. The word “hupakouete” for obey, implies a continuous action on the part of the children. Again this obedience does not mean that children are required to do evil things if parents demand such behavior of them.

 

Parents and especially fathers are also not to embitter or discourage their children with demeaning and unloving behavior towards them. The family unit is preserved and protected when godly “agape” love is given towards parents and from parents towards children. Mutual respect is expected in all family relationships, while there are also roles of authority and submission that must also be realized and practiced. Fathers are not to provoke their children to frustration but are to help build respect in their children for them as their parents. Parents do this with consistent and reasonable requests of them and wise advice given in love and in a loving manner. Fathers should not seek to provoke, irritate or nag their children so as to cause them to lose their temper. While this is a delicate skill at times, when parents are habitually and consistently working at loving their children appropriately the opportunity is much easier for the children to return such love and respect as is demanded of them. Excessive discipline, undue criticism, neglect, lack of godly standards, depreciating their worth and failing to show affection are all actions that can erode a loving parental child relationship.

 

Finally Paul comes to the practical application of scripture in what might be called the economic activity of individuals. While what is spoken of here is the relationship between slaves and their masters, it could be applied to employees and employers. This does not mean to imply that employees are slaves nor that employers are authoritarian masters, but it does show an example of how this could be applied to such a professional relationship in the work environment.

 

Paul states in Colossians 3:22-25, 4:1,

 “Slaves, obey your earthly masters in everything; and do it, not only when their eye is on you and to win their favor, but with sincerity of heart and reverence for the Lord. Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving. Anyone who does wrong will be repaid for his wrong, and there is no favoritism. Masters, provide your slaves with what is right and fair, because you know that you also have a Master in heaven.”

 

To apply this passage to today means that just as slaves were to obey their earthly masters, employees should follow instructions and work for their employers in a responsible fashion. Employees should not work hard and appropriately only when the “boss” is watching, but always out of a sincere heart to do a good job and out of reverence for Jesus Christ. We must realize whenever we work, we are working for our employer, but we are also working out our witness in our job as unto the Lord. When we work responsibly God will bless us for our work ethic, because that is what is expected from a Christian in the work force. If we wrong our employer by failing to do our job properly then we will receive our reward proportionately in heaven. This does not mean we will lose our salvation, but our reward in heaven is diminished whenever we fail to follow through on our obligations to God in our Christian walk which includes working as a good Christian employee.

 

Here Paul is talking to masters as well and saying they are to treat their slaves with respect and honor because their master is Jesus Christ. This tells us today that as employers we are to treat our employees with respect and grace as we would wish our Father in Heaven to treat us. Those who are in charge over workers must remember that they should treat those under them at work as they would wish to be treated by God in their spiritual life. There is a godly justice that our Heavenly Father wishes us to demonstrate towards each other not just at home but also in the work place.

 

In our next part we will be given instruction by Paul in how and what to pray about as well as some wisdom in how to live the Christian life.